The Drunken Pheasant
‘You always seem to have so much fun when you and Nazir play bridge at the Drunken Pheasant,’ said Maid Marian. ‘Can’t you take me there, just once?’
‘Too risky,’ Robin Hood replied. ‘If news reached the Sheriff that you’d been seen in my company, he would have you seized the moment you next attended court.’
‘You often disguise yourself,’ Marian retorted. ‘Do you think, just because I’m a woman, that I can’t do the same?’
The following Thursday, Robin and a rather strange-looking young lady walked into the Drunken Pheasant.
‘Good to see you, Robin,’ exclaimed the Landlord. He surveyed the outlaw’s partner uncertainly. ‘Nazir couldn’t play today?’
‘He’ll be partnering Friar Tuck,’ Hood replied. ‘My young friend Lucy, here, is just learning the game. She’s a bit nervous.’
Marian prodded Robin playfully. ‘Flamin’ cheek, I call it!’ she said, feigning a country accent. ‘When we were playin’ two nights ago, he went down in an easy 3 NT. Finessed the wrong hand for the queen of diamonds.’
The Landlord nodded politely. ‘It’s easily done,’ he replied.
The event was into its fifth round when Robin and Marian faced an elderly married couple on this board:
Dealer South. E/W Game.
| West | North | East | South |
| Pass | 1 NT | Pass | 3♣️ |
| Pass | 3❤️ | Pass | 4♠️ |
| All Pass | |||
Agnes Cabot, who could recognise an honour sequence when she saw one, led the jack of spades.
‘Thank you, er… Lucy,’ said Robin Hood when the dummy went down. His elderly opponent might not realise it, but she had found a good opening lead. Now, how could he reach dummy to take a discard on the diamond ace?
If he led a low club towards the jack, all would be well if West held the king of clubs. If the jack lost to the king with East, though, he would surely return another trump.
Hood soon spotted the play that was required. He won with the trump ace and then led the queen of clubs from his hand. William Cabot won with the king and returned a trump to declarer’s king. Hood crossed to dummy with the jack of clubs and discarded a heart on the ace of diamonds. A total of two clubs and a heart had to be lost, but the game was his.
William Cabot turned towards Robin Hood. ‘My king of clubs was under your ace-queen,’ he said.
Hood suppressed a smile. ‘I couldn’t be sure,’ he replied.
‘He let me make a trick with my king of clubs,’ the elderly East informed his wife. ‘It could be a good one for us.’
Maid Marian reached for the scoresheet. ‘No one else has made it so far,’ she observed.
Sometime later, Hood and Marian faced Nazir and Friar Tuck.
‘That’s surprising,’ Hood exclaimed. ‘I thought you’d have finished your pie by now, Tuck.’
An affronted Friar Tuck swallowed his mouthful. ‘As you know full well, this is not my first pie,’ he replied. ‘I come here only once a week. With such tasty fare on offer, I have to make the most of it.’
‘So that’s your second pie, then?’ persisted Robin Hood.
‘None of your business,’ Tuck replied, brushing some pastry flakes off his cassock. ‘It’s you to bid first, if you hadn’t noticed.’
This was the board before them:
Dealer South. Game All.
| West | North | East | South |
| 1♠️ | 2❤️ | Pass | 4❤️ |
| All Pass | |||
Nazir led the king of diamonds and Hood won with the ace. After drawing trumps in three rounds, he ran the ♣️ 9.
Friar Tuck had not been overjoyed by Robin’s remarks about his pie-eating. He won with the king of clubs, hoping to mislead the outlaw leader as to the position of the club queen. He then returned the ♣️ 8.
Robin Hood paused to consider the position. If the club queen was onside, as seemed likely, he would be able to discard a spade and score an overtrick. Still, Nazir might have covered the ♣️ 9 if he held the queen. No doubt Tuck would find it amusing to win with the king from king-queen. What could be done?
Robin Hood decided to rise with the spade king in second seat. Nazir nodded ruefully when he saw this card. He would have to win with the ace, otherwise declarer would make two spade tricks. Unfortunately, this would break the link between the defenders’ hands.
Nazir won with the ace of spades and returned the jack of spades to dummy’s queen. A diamond ruff to the South hand allowed Robin Hood to finesse the jack of clubs. As he had feared, Tuck won with the queen.
Thanks to declarer’s previous second-hand-high play of the spade king, Friar Tuck had no spades left. When he exited with a diamond, Robin Hood ruffed in his hand and discarded his last spade on dummy’s ace-ten of clubs.
‘You played it well,’ said Nazir. He turned towards Maid Marian. ‘What have you done to your face?’ he enquired. ‘Your skin is almost as dark as mine!’
‘It’s almond oil, part of my clever disguise,’ Marian replied. ‘No one here has recognised me. It feels horrible, wearing these dirty clothes. I’ll have to wash them as soon as I get home.’
Near the end of the session, Hood and Marian faced a local player, known as Unlucky Reginald. Twice widowed, he was the father of five daughters and would have no one to pass on his name. He had fallen off a horse many years ago and still walked with a pronounced limp.
This was the deal before them:
Dealer North. Love All.
| West | North | East | South |
| 1♠️ | 2❤️ | Pass | 4❤️ |
| All Pass | |||
Nazir led the king of diamonds and Hood won with the ace. After drawing trumps in three rounds, he ran the ♣️ 9. Friar Tuck won with the king of clubs, returned the ♣️ 8, and Hood paused to consider his options. If the club queen was onside, he could discard a spade and score an overtrick, but Nazir might have covered if holding it. Still, Hood’s second-hand-high play earlier meant Tuck was now endplayed — he had no spades left. When Tuck exited with a diamond, Hood ruffed and threw his last spade on dummy’s ace-ten of clubs to bring home his game.
‘Nothing wrong with the slam,’ declared Unlucky Reginald. ‘I can’t remember the last time I had any real luck at the bridge table.’
Sam Liggat inspected the score sheet. ‘I wasn’t expecting that,’ he exclaimed. ‘It’s a mixture of 980s and 480s.’ He turned towards Robin Hood. ‘Could Reginald have made twelve tricks?’
‘I don’t think so,’ Hood replied. ‘A better player would have ducked the first round of clubs, of course, noting that only four club tricks were needed for the slam. A play like that was way beyond such an unlucky player.’
‘I played it rather cleverly, combining two chances,’ said Unlucky Reginald. ‘No one can ask more than that.’
